Me: I am dying. I have a beaver of 200 degrees.
W: It is not that high.
How high is it?
101.
Well, it must have just dropped.
I think I have feline bovine disease.
You don't have feline bovine disease.
I think I have monkey pox from the zoo.
You don't have monkey pox.
It must be meningitis. Or Hepatitis D. Or C. Or B.
What about Hepatitis A?
Don't patronize me! I have galloping Pneumonia!
You don't have galloping Pneumonia.
Galloping Bronchitis?
Nothing is galloping.
You aren't a doctor. You don't know! You will be sorry when I am dead. I have crabgrass!
Would it help if you put the back of your hand on your forehead?
Yes, but I am too weak.
I will help you.
Thank you.
Would it help if you said "Woe is Me?"
Yes, but I am just going to whisper it because of my laryngitis.
woeisme
Is there anything else you need?
Sing me a spiritual.
Really?
Yes. Sing me "Nobody Knows."
(Sings.)
Thank you. Goodnight. I hope I see you in the morning.
Me too, sweetie.
Wednesday, September 05, 2007
Gamboo: An exchange.
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7 comments:
I had galloping pneumonia and my beaver spiked. I think, to be fair, you’d better stay in bed and eat more ice cream.
I hope it’s not consumption.
LOL
I need to wax my beaver.
Queen Scarlett wins for,
"I thought it too but she went ahead and said it".
f.u.n.n.y.
Try a hot toddy. I'm sure drinking is OK when you're sick and afflicted.
Or just try more cow bell. Works 90% of the time, every time.
Ha ha ha ha ha! Wax your beaver... or is "beaver" too pejorative? I hear the beavers prefer the term "va-jay-jay squirell."
I hope you feel better soon.
Julie, I can't believe you mentioned her va-jay-jay. She already told us she doesn't have one. Sheez. Be a little more sensitive.
You aren't a doctor. You don't know! How many times have I said this?
Ah Queen Scarlett, that's why I like your comments on this blog.
I think I wet myself. I luv U and I love W.
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